*[[ my only Hope ]]*

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

i'm prolly gonna regret doin this in the end.. but my brain isn't functionin & i can't seem to get the proper words on paper.. another 12 page paper down the drain..

I am: who everyone perceives me to be (but my true identity is even beyond my own knowledge)

I am not: constipated (thnk goodness for prunes.. right grace chan?)

I love: God.. to love and be loved

I hate: the word "hate".. the fact that no matter how much u plan, things don't go its proper route

I ate: air.. haven't eaten cuz of crzy paper

I said: i would never desert u, but it happened

I fear: intimacy.. close friendships (or any relationship that requires attachment).. gruesome death.. failure

I hope: that i can get myself off the internet and start doin work (it's 841 am.. due by 2)

I want: to rekindle the desire to learn, not just go to school for the purpose of goin

I regret: many things.. want a long list?

I cry over: everything.. even when i'm laughin, i'm cryin.. =P speakin of which, i cried this morning.. mom got mad at me.. i didn't get to start on my paper..

I care about : the tiny miniscule details & people who are neglected

I always: walk w/ my head up (that's why i'm always trippin on things.. haha).. be cautious when my head's down.. something might be goin wrong

I listen: to people, not just hear them

I believe: in the dogma, traditions, & customs of Catholicism.. that people have the potential to attain great things, they just have to put down the bag of potato chips & get off the couch

I hide from: GLAMA, esp. when i have a test the next day.. literally, boys.. i not only hide but run far far away

I sing when: i'm in lab (phys, microbio, anatomy, bio.. u name it! i sing).. "can u feel the love tonight"

I write: in the hearts of many.. the pen of "love" is intangible yet the effect is mesmerizing

I miss: the carefree years when all i worried about was who's gonna be the 1st to play chinese jump rope.. all the opportunities offered to me (because of feelings of inadequacy)

I learned: that life goes on.. that i can go a whole month w/out AIM.. that bein put up on a pedestal can lead to hatred

I feel: so alone.. i'd rather be dead & in heaven, than live in a secular world that knows nothin of the great happiness in store for them above

I know: that i'm missin my bio class today

I dream about: i don't really remember any of them.. it's rare for me to dream cuz i'm awake most of the time

I wonder about: the purpose of my existence

I have: "2 hands, the left & the right".. haha.. to laugh at everythin (it just happens)

I give: time.. understandin.. an open heart

I fight: for the right to bite.. grrrrr.. with my mother (only cuz she loves me to care)

I need: a hug.. friends who i can see in a regular basis

I say: things w/out thinkin sometimes.. "no, but i've seen some scrubs lately"

*[[ poked by Michelle ]]*
|8:36 AM|

Comments: Post a Comment

[[ And it was said… ]]

I'm going to stop procrastinating ... once I get around to it. - unknown (nor surprisingly)

[[ The Thank List ]]

[x] done with finals
[x] moms and grandmoms

[[ May ]]

Birthdays
[7] francine
[21] Stephanie
Others
[8] tita san’s 1st death anniversary
[9] span final
[11] Francine’s potluck
[13] rocio’s navy commissioning
[14] rosemary’s bday, MSMC grad (j.duncan, farrah, nancy); USC grad (chloe, hillary, imee, leah, paniz, sia, steve)
[15] nancy & Michael’s engagement bbq

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

*[[ The magic within... ]]*
|8:36 AM|